I am bored and I need to DO SOMETHING.

I had started a quilt for the fall, thinking it would help, but it isn't enough, even though I am doing quite well on it. I wanted to learn to play the piano this winter, but I can't really afford the decent digital piano I wanted, so that's out.

I don't want to sit around all winter just getting Caden from school (1pm) and then picking him up again (3:30pm) such a short time later. I do nothing else right now. Wake up, struggle to get us both ready, out the door to drop him off. Then I come home and just kind of sit here killing time (which is getting old fast) until it is time to go get him. Then he watches tv for an hour until I make him dinner. Then shortly after we do the bedtime routine. He is in bed by 8 and there I sit until whenever Matt gets home. He mumbles a hi, but doesn't say much because his day is crazy long and lately he has been far too busy. We might watch something on tv, then he goes to bed. And then I sit there until sometime around 3am when I am finally tired enough to go to bed. That is literally my ENTIRE day, every single weekday.

Weekends are only slightly different. Matt is home, so he watches Caden too. We might go out together and get coffee, or wander at one store or another. But other than that, the routine isn't that different. Either way, I need something else to do!

So what do I do? I want to do something with my life, but I have zero idea what. I missed the cutoff to apply for nursing school, but after my little breakdown last time I was in nursing school, I am not so sure if it is a great idea anyway. I just can't think of much else want to do. I considered going to pastry arts since I love to bake. It's just a hobby though, not sure I'd love it all the time, or where I would even get a job since I wouldn't want to work in any huge bakery or a restaurant.

Nursing school doesn't start again until next fall, so I have a full year. My unemployment money runs out sometime after the new year, and I will need some sort of job. I was considering a bookstore, or maybe in a coffee shop. I have also considered doing it NOW, so the money fights can stop. The whole bit about figuring out childcare stops me though... it seems a mess to try to work out. I don't need it if I can't get a job, but I don't want to apply for a job until I have childcare worked out. Mostly I am pissed that it falls entirely on my shoulders, since I am not the only parent, but he works so much I might as well be!

I do have a tiny bit of good news- tomorrow one of my most favourite cousins is coming to visit me with a good friend of ours as well. This will help me not feel like such a completely friendless loser for at least 4 days while they are here. Not sure how I will feel when they leave though and it goes back to the usual.